Tuesday, May 02, 2006
It seems like I wake up with a headache and I go to bed with a headache. I get too stressed, too easily. It does not help that I woke up to people screaming at one another this morning. Lets just say some people are being users and other people are not appreciating it very much.
I have to figure something out because I feel like I am living in a constant state of pain. I really do not want to have to go on migraine meds. I did that when I was younger and it just stinks to have to wake up and take a pill to make sure you avoid going blind from a migraine while driving the car. I will think of something I'm sure.
So last night while I was awake thinking of horrible things that can happen, I got that bright idea that I would pass the time by reading. I've got like 5 books I'm in the middle of right now. The one about nuns, the Difficult Child book (I'm trying to retain that info...but I'm so tired I have to reread everything like 5 times to understand what he is saying and relate it to our situation), this book about a Hmong girl with Epilepsy, a book about what parents do to screw up their kids, and Sarah Smiley's book Going Overboad about her life as a military wife. I chose the last one to read since I could relate more and it's pretty light reading. The only problem was I got to the point in the book where she talks about her husbands deployment and my brain went into overdrive thinking of horrible things. I decided to call Kevin instead and see what trouble he was getting into. He always makes me feel better. His reaction to the horribe things I was thinking --"Knock that shit off. We've already talked about this stuff..." Yeah Celeste! Knock it off. Where's that leather hide?! Stop being such a girl. *sniffle* Ok.
So at Mass this guy I knew when I worked at the bank, years ago now, sat down behind me and at the sign of peace he was all about shaking my hand and looking over Anneliese and asking how I'm doing. He had a crush on me when we worked together. He's seen me at Mass before but he's never said anything before. I wonder what he thinks, seeing me there on my own with the kids all the time. I've noticed other guys checking me out and it's wierd. I have two kids. I'm married. I wear wedding rings! This guy came yesterday from the phone company to add a new line downstairs...he was totally checking me out and I'm in my pj's, ( I threw on a sweatshirt really quick so I at least was a little more covered), with my hair all messy a kid hanging onto my leg. Just weird. I asked my gay friend Greg about it. He goes "You're a hot Mom. Get used to it. Your kids friends will probably hit on you when he's a teenager." Mm-k. Too much info for my brain.