Wednesday, April 18, 2012
I'm venting, so hold on.
Don't take it too seriously. Some times I need to just get it out!
Some day's can be a challenge with an Aspie who doesn't understand why you haven't completed all the tasks on your to-do list, including running his errands or doing what he considers necessary. I have no excuses. I have reasons. Mom needs to be able to take a moment to catch her breath too.
Between chasing the 2 year old off the top of the fridge and trying not to get disconnected on the phone with the doctor again...No I didn't pack your lunch this morning! Really...anxiety over not packing lunch. To a normal person this would seem ridiculous. But. There's the but. I know the anxiety is really about having to go in the lunch line, which is not routine, and make decisions quickly which he's not good at doing at all. Sometimes I just want a little give-way.
Needless to say, his lunch got packed two minutes before the bus arrive.
When I am tired I get unreasonable in expecting certain things from my kids that I know they aren't capable of. They aren't good at spur of the moment stuff, large social settings, changes in routine, or expectations that might be normal to some. I have days where I just want things to go "my way". I'm laughing as I write that because nothing ever goes my way. I'm not sure you get used to things never going the way you want, but rather you learn to tolerate it as part of how your life goes with high needs kids. Rigidity and routine. You learn to go along rather than rock the boat. Storms are not fun. There is always clean up afterwards.
Ok. On with the day!